Following
IpWithStupid
Studies at Regis High School
Lives in Staten Island
Single
Speaks English, Latin,
Born on July 8, 1995
From Brooklyn
i have been awake for 52 hours
i spent 24 hours watching every star wars movie, then wrote a five page english paper on a short story that i didn’t read, and am now desperately trying to scrape together a 7 page history paper (on the fifth page).
Fuck You (Shakespearean Adaptation)
When I behold you riding with my dear
Throughout the town, I bite my thumb at you
Perchance my groats could never keep her here.
I bite my thumb at you and at her too.
Were I richer I would be her suitor,
And is this not a fact of filth and scum?
Though she hurt me, I will still salute her
The aforementioned way: I bite my thumb.
I’faith I cannot purchase you a steed
But I can yet transport you where you will.
If he is chess then I am bowls, indeed
Regardless of the game, you’re cheating still.
I pity foolish men who love that whore
She looks for naught but gold; know that, good Moor.
Sexy and I Know It (Shakespearean Adaptation)
Whereupon I walk they doth admire
My countenance, my rhythm, and my airs.
Thus, I move with pelts and fierce attire
The look of Ethiop beswells my hair.
O, lady, venerate that muscled frame.
O, lady, idolize that sculpted shape.
I build my bulking form by lifting weights.
When I arrive anon I do declare
All business halts as I their eyes attract
While passion fills my breech, I don’t despair.
For I am lusty, yea, I know that fact.
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle,
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle.
(via do-you-love-this-shit)
Love and Regards
Now here’s a situation you run into all the time. You notice how when you’re leaving someone they’ll give you a message to give to someone else? Like they say, “Give my love to Klaus! Tell Klaus Rebecca sends her love!” Do you mind that? Do you mind being used that way? Do you mind the awesome responsibility of having to carry Rebecca’s love to Klaus? Suppose you don’t see Klaus, what are you gonna do with Rebecca’s love, carry it around, give it to someone else? Maybe. ”Wilhelm, I can’ find Klaus, here’s some of Rebecca’s love.” Suppose Wilhelm doesn’t know Rebecca, can he legally accept her love, especially when it was originally intended for Klaus? Suppose you give Wilhelm Rebecca’s love for Klaus and then you see Klaus, what are you going to give him? All you had was Rebecca’s love, and you’ve already gone and given that to Wilhelm. Can you logically ask Wilhelm to give back Rebecca’s love to Klaus? Maybe he’s gotten used toit by now. Can Klaus sue Wilhelm? Can Wilhelm be arrested? Can you be arrested for transporting love across a state line? Just for the sake of argument, let’s leave Wilhelm out of this altogether. Suppose Rebecca gives you her love to give to Klaus and you do see Klaus, what form should the love take? Can you risk giving Klaus a tongue kiss? Which brings up another problem, maybe Klaus is gay. Klaus doesn’t want Rebecca’s love, Klaus wants Wilhelm’s love! If Klaus tells you to give his love to Wilhelm, say, “Bullshit, Klaus! You give your own love to Wilhelm, I’m going to find Rebecca!”
